A Change in Plans…

You know when you are growing up how you have a picture of what your life is going to be? A handsome husband, two kids, a boy and a girl, and a dog (or cat), great paying job, all by the time you are 30 – right? But then life happens and things don’t go as planned for whatever reason.  All things considered, I’m a pretty lucky girl. Most of my “plans” have come true. I have a handsome husband [at least I think I do 😉 ], a wonderful little boy, an amazing dog, and a great paying job doing what I love, in a fantastic city.  But Matt and I had to make a pretty tough decision last week. We decided to stop proceeding with our second adoption.  We would love for Alex to have a sibling, and we would love to adopt again – however we are just not there yet. As you know, the adoption process is an emotional roller coaster – and we want to focus on our family of three right now – and enjoy Alex and all his wonderfullness.  As I mentioned – we would love to adopt again, but when we put ourselves on the Call Back list for our agency again, we were just home from Seoul, on a real “adoption high”, and were scared about the potential 2012/2014 cut off date for Korean adoptions.   We assumed we would be ready in a year – but we are not there yet.  It was a very hard (and emotionally draining) decision to make – and honestly, I wasn’t in a very good place for a few days. But things are getting better. I just have to look at Alex and know that I have the most amazing little guy.

So there you have it. That’s the reason for the blogging break. 

Ok, so once I load the software for my NEW CAMERA! I will share some pics from the last week.

30 responses

  1. Sweetheart, I know exactly what you mean. It’s only possible for peeps who have been through it to get it.

    Hugs, love, strength and good wishes. You have a beautiful family xox

  2. hugs! Maybe there is a second child for you further down the road, maybe not. Perhaps if there is, they will not be born in Korea. And if there is not, 3 is a wonderful size family to have… plus your dear doggy of course!

  3. Krista, I think you are an incredible strong lady. Good for you and your family of 3 for making these tough decisions. Life certainly does happen, and things have a way of sorting themselves out. This is such an emotional journey. One that I never thought that I would come out of! If there is anything that you need, or even just an ear to listen, I am here for you. Thinking of you today. Take good care. xo

  4. Oh Krista. What an incredibly tough decision to make. All I know is that things *will* work out, no matter *how* they do. And I love that you’re approaching this as an opportunity to give Alex more love and attention. I’m sure this has been so hard on you all. Hugs to you!!!

  5. I’m so sorry you were faced with such a difficult decision. Life has a way of working things out, you never know what the future holds. I’m glad you’re back and feeling better about things. You really do have a beautiful family and an amazing boy.

  6. I’m pretty terrified about having two children…now you know you can really enjoy Alex and focus on life, in general, right now. Things will definitely work out. Enjoy the camera!! I haven’t had a second to take a decent picture and it’s starting to depress me. Talk soon!

  7. In a non-A.P. kinda way, I understand too. Our second child is a moving target. Some days I’m ready, and others I’m not sure I’ll ever be ready. Good for you for knowing your heart!

  8. I am glad you are feeling better. That is such a tough decision, but one you did not come to easily, so you know it is the right thing right now. Alex is such a beautiful boy and so loved already. When/if the time comes to expand your family, you will all be ready. I can’t wait to see the new pics!

  9. Big hugs! You need to make the decisions that are best for you! Good for you two for talking about and making the tough decisions together. Thinking of you.

  10. What a very mature and honest decision to have to make. You have lots of people out here who are very proud of you and Matt for being honest with yourselves. Hard for us to do sometimes in life. You have a very wonderful little boy and maybe someday you will be ready to expand your family. Until then enjoy each other!

  11. Some day you’ll look back and understand why things went they way they did. In this world of adoption, you really start to believe that things happen the way they are meant to. Until then, however, it’s difficult. I’m thinking about you and I know that things will work out.

  12. You are a brave family to make such a tough decision. Things will work out PERFECTLY the way they are meant to be whether you are a family of three, four or more! xoxo

  13. Krista, I can’t even begin to imagine how emotionally exhausting this decision must have been. I truly believe that everything happens for a reason. So many times in my life I haven’t understood why things were going a certain way, and most of the time I have been able to look back in amazement how things worked out just as they were meant to be.
    ( ohhh, and I agree…your husband is quite handsome! )
    HUGS to you!

  14. Oh, what a tough time for you. I’m glad you guys were able to think things through and come to the best decision for your wonderful family. ((Hugs))

  15. I think you are so brave – it is a very tough decision, but the right one for your family of three at this time. I will be keeping in my thoughts and prayers.

  16. Krista, I know exactly what you are going through. We went through the same rollercoaster ride of emotions… Everything will work itself out in the end. One child, or two (or six!)… life moves forward and brings wonderful surprises 🙂

  17. Wow–that sounds like a very difficult decision to make. You and your husband obviously put a lot of thought into deciding what is best for your family right now. I think it’s so important that you went with your feelings of not being quite ready. Enjoy your little one in all his wonderfulness!

  18. I think it is good that you decided to stop, think, discuss, and make the best decision for where you are in your lives right now. I’m sure it was a hard decision to make, but an honest one…and those are the best kinds. I know what you mean about being on an “adoption high.” I’ve been there…thinking we’re maybe ready to consider thing again…but then realizing *no way*, we’re not…and may never be. Your family is beautiful.

  19. Sending hugs your way! It is great that you and Matt were able to make a very hard, but honest decision together. You two know what is best for you and your family.

    Continue to enjoy your time as a family of three! Can’t wait to hear all about the new and wonderful things that Alex does. Looking forward to seeing the new pics too!

  20. Tough decision to make, but it was obviously weighing on you. It should be a happy time and if you’re not ready…it’s not. So good for you for recognizing that and taking a break.

  21. Hey Kriesta

    Everything happens as it’s supposed to- Alex is still young and I think it’s great you want to focus more on what you have right now. If you weren’t ready but still went through with it for the wrong reasons, that wouldn’t have been good for anyone all around- Only you guys can know what’s right for your family.

    Lots of love.

  22. Krista, I’m sorry you’ve had to make such a difficult decision, but I love the way Colleen put it. I feel the same way when I look back on my tough decisions. Each one was necessary to bring me to where I am today, and I don’t have any regrets. Hugs to you!!!

  23. Joining in on the discussion a bit late but you never know where life will take you. Just look at that miracle son of yours. Surely the future holds more amazing things for you and your family. It’s all in the timing. Hope you are doing well.

  24. I have no doubt that this is the right decision for your family. You are so right about the emotional rollercoaster of the adoption process. I am trying my hardest just to step away right now from the process of our second, and just enjoy every moment with little Jaden. Thank you for your honesty and words that are so obviously self-aware.

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